Thursday, February 26, 2015

Miscarriage Sucks

That pretty much sums it up.  I, like many other women out there, recently suffered a miscarriage.  I went back and forth if I wanted to share this part of my life with my readers, but I just knew I had to. Keeping your feelings in from this loss only makes it worse.  It's very easy to feel you are alone when you experience the loss of a pregnancy, and if my story can comfort someone the way others' stories have comforted me during this time it will be the least I can do.

On Christmas morning, I found out I was pregnant.  My period was 3 days late (which wasn't unusual), but I thought if it was positive it would be a great Christmas gift.  Before everyone woke up, I took the test and it was a big YES.  I woke up Jay with the news and we spent the next few minutes relishing in our happiness.  After four months of trying, we were so excited!  

Christmas Morning Excitement

After Wyatt opened up his abundance of presents, we told our immediate family.  We couldn't keep this exciting news in, plus it would be pretty obvious when I wasn't having any wine with dinner.

Everything seemed to be going perfectly well, I felt the same as I did with Wyatt.  I had some minor cramping, and was a little moody and tired.  I made my first appointment for when we moved to Tallahassee, and couldn't wait until that first ultrasound.

Jay left on Monday, January 12th to drive down some things to our house in Florida.  I was 6 weeks pregnant.  Wyatt woke up from his nap and I fixed his lunch then headed to the bathroom.  I noticed some spotting and freaked out.  No major cramps, no pain, just spotting.  I new I had to get a Rhogam shot because of my O negative blood type.  I called my doctor and they advised me to go to the ER.  

Wyatt and I spent 5 long hours in the hospital.  It was so hard being so anxious and dealing with my energetic toddler!  I wasn't bleeding much, but my main goal was to get an ultrasound and the Rhogam shot and get out of there as quickly as possible.  After waiting, taking vitals, waiting, ultrasound, waiting, results....I finally got my shot and some information.  Poor Wyatt was "done, done, done".  The doctor said they found a gestational sac on the ultrasound but no heart beat.  He said it was still early, and it was possible I was still pregnant.  Also, my hcg levels were showing I was about 6 weeks pregnant.  I would have to go to my doctor to check my hormone levels in a week and have an ultrasound in 2 weeks.  

Jay flew home late that night from the road to be with me.  I was exhausted, scared and broke down.  The next morning I went to the bathroom and the bleeding was very heavily.  I knew I was miscarrying and I just sat there and cried.

I spent the next week going through the miscarriage, for me physically, it was not much different than a bad period.  It was a sad week.  I went to the doctor and took a pregnancy test, it was negative.   She told me there was no way to tell what happened.  The unknown is never fun, but unfortunately that's how it goes I guess.

One week later I was in Tallahassee and had an ultrasound to make sure everything looked okay.  It was so sad walking into that office... I was supposed to be there to see my baby for the first time... but now it was to verify that there was not a baby.  The good news was that I looked healthy and we could start trying again in a couple months.

Just writing this down made me cry. The last time I cried about my miscarriage was in that doctor's office, when after the ultrasound the doctor said, "I'm sorry for your loss".  It has been about 6 weeks now since my miscarriage, and it has gotten better.  I have hope that Wyatt will have an amazing sibling soon, and that he or she was meant to be in our lives just a little later than we had hoped.  I can't wait for that day when our little family will be complete.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

The Burger's Priest

I was going through my photos today and realized I forgot to do one last post about the best burger we had in Toronto, at The Burger's Priest.

It was our last full day in Canada and realized the newest outpost of this local chain was only about a mile from our hotel.  We got there right before noon, glad we got there before the huge rush!  The place was a zoo when we left.  Anyway... Our food took about 10 minutes and came out hot and fresh.  Wyatt got a "half Vatican", a grilled cheese.  So what is the (full) Vatican you ask?  Two of those grilled cheeses with a burger patty in the middle.  I wanted to order one so badly but I just couldn't get myself to go through with it.

Jay and I each got a double cheeseburger.  It was an amazing burger.  The patties were juicy with a nice crust from the griddle.  The squishy buns were the perfect complement.

The fries were fresh cut, hot and crisp.  I wanted to eat every last one but my stomach could no longer handle all the food I was stuffing it with.

If you are going to Toronto, this is a must for a quick meal!  Maybe it's good I didn't try it out earlier?  My waistline wouldn't have been happy.

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

The Excitement of Grocery Shopping

I love going to the grocery stores back home in the states.... Oreos Oreos everywhere!  I missed the huge variety that we have here... it may be a tad unnecessary, but it is awesome.

One of the first places we went to get groceries was Trader Joe's.  I was ecstatic when I found out that there was one in Tallahassee.

Of course I had to get a treat for myself.  Cowboy Bark was calling my name!  This stuff is sinfully delicious.

Wyatt had his first Publix cookie!  He immediately gobbled it up and said "more".  Have they made the cookies smaller over the years?  But at least they still give these out to kids for free... just another reason to love Publix besides the subs.

Move-in grocery shopping isn't complete without a trip to Costco!  Wyatt had his "big doggie" along for the ride.  That Ikea stuffed animal is now his favorite.  We perused the aisles and ate lots of samples.  Wyatt loved these organic veggie patties so we bought a pack.  Of course as soon as I made one at home he didn't want it, haha.

One of the best things about grocery stores in the U.S. vs. Ontario... buying wine and beer IN the supermarket!  In the states it means bigger variety, lower prices, and super convenient. It's the American way! hehe. Plus, this mama needs her happy hour after a long day.

What are your fave finds at TJ's or Costco?

Monday, February 16, 2015

We made it to Tally!

We are finally... almost... settled in to our new home here in Tallahassee.  I can't believe it's only been 3 weeks since we have left Canada!  It was sad leaving our house there, but honestly I was really excited to be out of the bitter cold.

I was actually pleasantly surprised on how Wyatt behaved on the flights and in the airport.  Only two screaming fits occurred, phew.  I have to say I was pretty scared for the long day of travel and 2 flights.  But our little man sure had fun wandering around the airports.

When we got into our car I was thrilled to be able to put the windows down!  Wyatt loved it too.  He kept saying "windy".  It has been a long time since we have been able to drive with the breeze in our hair.

Wyatt had his dinner and we put him right to bed, then Jay ran off to Publix to get some essential supplies for the night... beer and Publix subs of course.  There were no good subs near our home in Canada.  Plus, lets face it, it doesn't get much better than one from Publix.  I had the Ultimate and Jay had the Italian.  We truly enjoyed that Abita Amber and sub dinner!

Have a great Monday! More Tally shenanigans tomorrow...